By We Level Up Editorial Team | Edited By Rebecca Hill | Medically Reviewed By Dr. Chris Small

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) involves rapid changes in mood, acting on impulses, and having a distorted sense of self. Even though BPD impacts people from all genders, there are signs showing that women receive more diagnoses. The way symptoms show up in women vs men can be drastically different.
It is very important to know the signs and factors behind women with BPD, as this helps with better, quicker treatment. Also, it helps reduce stigma and encourages people to learn more.
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Studies show that at least 75% of people diagnosed with BPD are women. A number of factors may contribute to this trend, like social pressures and possible medical setting biases.
Borderline personality disorder typically appears first in teenagers or young adults. It usually disrupts a person’s ability to cope with relationships, attend school, or feel happy.
There is a lot of stigma toward women with BPD. It is sometimes thought that these women act in ways that get them too much attention or sympathy, which can stop them from receiving proper care. If we know the symptoms, we can help with proper diagnosis, loving support, and suitable BPD treatment.
We Level Up Washington treats women with BPD in areas like Spokane, Seattle, Otis Orchards, and beyond. We provide the tools for women with mood disorders and personality disorders.
Symptoms of BPD in Females
The symptoms of BPD in females are outlined in the DSM-5, but their expression in women can vary and sometimes overlap with other psychological conditions. In people with BPD, the following are widely cited as common symptoms in women.
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Disturbed Emotions
Having trouble controlling your emotions is a main feature of BPD. Many women with BPD can feel either elation or despair, and can be calm one minute and rageful the next. They often experience severe mood swings.
Relationship Instability
Relationships change quickly and may be unstable. Someone with BPD may look up to a person one time and then afterward view them with disdain. Because of this pattern mentioned as “splitting,” there is often conflict, communication breakdown and difficulty preserving long relationships.
Identity Problem
Patients with BPD might have an unstable view of who they are. Lots of women say they are unsure about their identity or their life goals. When somebody’s self-image is not stable, they may change their career paths, friendships, ambitions, or moral beliefs.
Impulsivity
Characteristic impulsive behavior is also seen in children with ADHD. BPD causes some women to participate in unsafe acts, for example, substance abuse, overspending, risky sex, binge eating, or driving recklessly.
Self-Harm and Suicidal Tendencies
One of the ways people manage their emotions is by hurting themselves by cutting, burning or banging their head. Sometimes, if someone feels abandoned or rejected, serious ongoing thoughts of suicide might occur.
Chronic Feelings of Emptiness
Many women who have BPD talk about consistently feeling that there is nothing left inside of them. People may feel like they are missing something all the time which can result in boredom, lack of excitement or a strong sense of failing to find meaning in life.
Intense Anger
Anger that appears quickly and doesn’t fit the situation/trigger is also experienced in this stage. Women having BPD might find it tough to control their emotions which can cause them to speak angrily, fight physically or destroy things that later make them feel bad.
Paranoia and Dissociation
This can make you feel like you are watching your own thoughts and feelings from a distance.
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Causes of BPD in Women
The causes of BPD in females is linked to several things, including family history, brain and nervous system changes, psychological factors and environmental factors. Social and cultural norms can lead these pressures to interact differently in women.
- Family Studies – It has been noticed in families that BPD can be passed down genetically. A person’s risk of having BPD increases by a lot when a first-degree relative has the condition. Variations in the system that controls serotonin which is linked to mood, might cause those with the disorder to act more impulsively and have unstable emotions.
- Abuse and Neglect in Childhood – Many women with this mental health condition share that they went through abuse, neglect, or traumatic experiences in their early lives. Many studies link physical, emotional and sexual abuse to the later emergence of borderline personality disorder in women (BPD). Exposure to this kind of trauma causes emotional problems that may last for many years.
- Insecure or Unstable Attachment which frequently happens when a child experiences inconsistency, lack of attention or abuse in care, may result in later emotional problems and struggles in relationships.
- It has been observed with brain imaging that the amygdala and prefrontal cortex, which are involved in emotion regulation, may differ in people affected by BPD. These difficulties may be caused by these abnormalities.
- Social Influence – Many women are expected by society to focus on helping others and restrain their assertion. Dealing with what society expects, the standards for beauty and typical gender roles can create internal stress, resulting in a person feeling not good enough and disturbed emotionally. They may lead to a higher chance of getting BPD.
- Intergenerational Trauma – A history of trauma experienced by older family members can be one reason for BPD. A parent with difficulty controlling their own emotions might behave in a stressful way and not supply stable support.
- Changes in hormone levels, which happen during puberty, menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause, may cause changes in how someone manages their emotions. How neurotransmitters change when estrogen levels increase is another possible reason.
- Social exclusion, bullying, or ostracism at a young age usually leads to a decrease in self-esteem and can make someone more sensitive to emotional issues.
- Discarding a Child’s Feelings – Having emotions dismissed in their childhood can lead women to feel shame and develop negative coping techniques for their emotions. The fear of abandonment follows them to adulthood.
- Seeing Unstable Role Models – Viewing unhealthy or abusive interactions between caregivers affects a young girl’s way of understanding relationships which can make her feel confused, afraid and full of emotional ups and downs.
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Treatment and Diagnosis
Correctly diagnosing Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) means the clinician must look over the patient’s medical history; examine their symptoms; and sometimes, conduct formal interviews or apply psychological tests. Usually, treatment includes different types of care:
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) aims to improve emotion regulation, help people tolerate intense feelings, become happier at work, and live mindfully.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) – Helps detect and replace unhelpful thoughts with more realistic ones.
- Mentalization-Based Therapy (MBT) – Helps individuals become better at understanding their thoughts and those of others.
- Change focuses on identifying and shifting harmful, habitual thinking habits in Schema-Focused Therapy.
- Some medication may be prescribed, although it is normally not the only treatment used.
- Peer Support Groups provide understanding and a bond with those who have gone through similar experiences.
- Trauma-Informed Care – Creates a setting where individuals feel safe and form trust in their therapy.
Life with BPD: The Difficulties and Ways to Manage
Overcoming difficulties from BPD is not easy, but many women can handle these difficulties by using helpful coping skills and surrounding themselves with support. Awareness of yourself helps you handle your emotions and the things that set them off.
Conclusion
Borderline Personality Disorder in females is a multifaceted condition shaped by emotional, psychological, biological, and social factors. Though its symptoms can be distressing, they are manageable with the right support. As awareness grows and more women speak openly about their experiences, stigma continues to decrease.
Healthcare providers, educators, and loved ones all play a part in improving outcomes for women with BPD. Understanding it as a disorder rooted in both pain and resilience allows society to shift from judgment to compassion. Women with BPD are not broken—they are wounded, healing, and fully capable of living lives filled with meaning, purpose, and connection.
Need help with your mental health problems? You should see a mental health professional. Reach out to We Level Up for diagnosis and treatment.
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