BPD Splitting Meaning, Duration, Causes, & Treatment

Borderline Personality Disorder Statistics

The most effective way to treat BPD is through an interprofessional team composed of psychiatrists, psychologists, pharmacists, mental health nurses, and social workers. According to recent studies, 1.6% of people in the United States have BPD. It might seem like a modest percentage, but considering how big the United States is, you may realize that 1.6% represents a sizable portion of the population. One of the hardest mental health diseases to treat is borderline personality disorder. 

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• Devaluation: Conversely, individuals may abruptly shift to devaluing others, perceiving them as entirely negative, flawed, or even evil. They may attribute all their problems or negative experiences to the other person, vilifying them and disregarding any positive qualities they may possess.
• Unstable Relationships: Splitting can profoundly impact relationships, leading to intense and volatile dynamics. Individuals with BPD may experience rapid shifts in their feelings toward others, leading to frequent conflicts, breakups, or extreme emotional reactions within relationships.
• Fear of Abandonment: Splitting can be driven by a deep-seated fear of abandonment, causing individuals to cling to others during idealization phases and push them away during devaluation phases. This fear often stems from past experiences of real or perceived abandonment or rejection.
• Emotional Instability: Splitting is accompanied by intense emotional experiences. Individuals may rapidly swing from euphoria and elation during idealization to anger, despair, or emptiness during devaluation. These emotional fluctuations can be distressing and challenging to manage.
• Impulsive Behavior: Splitting can contribute to impulsive behaviors, such as reckless spending, substance abuse, self-harm, or impulsive relationship decisions. These behaviors may serve as a coping mechanism to regulate intense emotions associated with splitting episodes.

Not all individuals with BPD experience splitting, and symptoms can vary in severity and frequency. Diagnosis and treatment should be sought from mental health professionals who can provide a comprehensive assessment and personalized care.

• Coping Mechanism: Splitting can serve as a coping mechanism for individuals with BPD to manage intense emotions, fear of abandonment, and feelings of insecurity. Individuals may temporarily alleviate distress and gain control by dividing people or situations into all good or bad.

While these factors may contribute to the development of splitting in BPD, each individual’s experience is unique. BPD is a complex disorder, and a comprehensive understanding of its causes and treatment requires a thorough evaluation by a mental health professional. Effective treatment approaches, such as dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), can help individuals with BPD develop healthier thinking patterns and improve their overall well-being.

Splitting BPD Examples

To provide a better understanding of splitting in BPD, here are a few examples that illustrate how this cognitive distortion manifests:

• Idealization Example: Sarah meets a new friend, Amy, and instantly becomes infatuated with her. She believes Amy is the most amazing person she has ever met, showering her with excessive praise and admiration. Sarah sees Amy as flawless, attributing all positive qualities to her and becoming completely dependent on her for emotional support. She idealizes Amy to the point where she believes Amy can do no wrong.
• Devaluation Example: Mark is in a romantic relationship with Jane. During a disagreement, Jane unintentionally upsets Mark. At that moment, Mark’s perception of Jane suddenly shifts. He devalues her, seeing her as cruel and manipulative. Mark focuses solely on Jane’s negative traits and ignores any positive aspects of their relationship. He becomes convinced that Jane deliberately tries to hurt him, leading to intense anger and resentment towards her.
• Unstable Views Example: Lisa has a coworker named John. One day, John compliments Lisa on her work, and she instantly idealizes him, considering him the best coworker ever. However, John makes a minor mistake on a project the following day. Lisa’s perception of him quickly shifts to devaluation. She believes he is incompetent and begins criticizing him, disregarding their previous interactions’ positive aspects.
• Oscillating Relationships Example: Michael is dating Emily. They have a passionate and intense relationship. However, during a heated argument, Michael feels emotionally hurt and betrayed by Emily. In response, he abruptly ends the relationship and cuts off all contact. He views Emily as toxic and entirely responsible for the downfall of their relationship. A few days later, Michael experiences a wave of loneliness and longing for Emily. He reaches out to her, idealizing her again and wanting to reconcile.

These examples highlight the rapid shifts in perception and extreme evaluations that individuals with BPD may experience during splitting episodes. It’s important to note that these examples are generalizations, and the specific manifestations of splitting can vary among individuals with BPD.

How to stop splitting BPD? Coping Strategies

Managing and reducing splitting tendencies in BPD can be challenging, but with consistent effort and appropriate strategies, it is possible to gain better control over this cognitive distortion. Here are some approaches that can help:

• Therapy: Seek professional help from a mental health professional, preferably one experienced in treating BPD. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a widely recommended therapeutic approach for BPD that focuses on emotion regulation, mindfulness, interpersonal effectiveness, and distress tolerance. Through therapy, you can develop skills to recognize and challenge splitting patterns.
• Awareness and Mindfulness: Practice self-awareness and mindfulness to observe your thoughts and emotions without judgment. Pay attention to moments when you notice yourself engaging in black-and-white thinking. By being aware of your splitting tendencies, you can begin interrupting the automatic thought processes associated with splitting.
• Cognitive Restructuring: Challenge and reframe your thoughts by considering alternative perspectives. When polarizing someone or a situation, identify and acknowledge the gray areas. Consider the possibility that people can have positive and negative qualities, and situations can be more complex than they initially appear.
• Emotion Regulation: Develop healthy strategies for managing intense emotions associated with BPD. Engage in activities promoting emotional regulation, such as deep breathing exercises, journaling, or hobbies. Learning to tolerate distressing emotions can reduce the need to split as a coping mechanism.
• Validate and Self-Validate: Practice validating your own emotions and experiences. Acknowledge that your feelings are valid, even if they may be intense or contradictory. By self-validating, you can reduce the reliance on external validation, which can contribute to splitting.
• Healthy Boundaries: Establish and maintain healthy boundaries in your relationships. Setting clear boundaries can help manage expectations and prevent idealization or devaluation based on temporary circumstances. Communicate your needs and limits effectively.
• Self-Care and Support: Engage in self-care activities that promote emotional well-being, such as exercise, maintaining a balanced lifestyle, and connecting with supportive friends or loved ones. Surrounding yourself with a strong support network can provide stability and understanding during challenging moments.

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