What Is a Narcissist? Narcissistic Traits and Finding Help

Have you ever met someone who always needs to be the center of attention and seems to care only about themselves? Or maybe a loved one makes you feel small while acting like they are better than everyone else. If this sounds familiar, you might be wondering, What is a narcissist? You are not alone. Many people search for answers when narcissistic behaviors hurt their relationships or daily life.

At We Level Up Washington in Spokane Valley, we see people every day who deal with these issues. We will look at what narcissistic personality disorder is or what is a narcissistic person, the signs to watch for, and steps you can take to feel better. Whether you think you have narcissistic traits or you live with someone who does, help is possible. Let’s break it down together.

What Does Narcissist Mean?

A narcissist is a person who shows a strong pattern of thinking they are more important than others, needing lots of praise, and having little care for how others feel. This comes from narcissistic personality disorder, or NPD for short. Doctors describe NPD as a mental health condition where someone has a big sense of self-importance and a deep need for others to admire them.

The American Psychiatric Association explains that people with NPD often lack empathy, which means they struggle to understand or share other people’s feelings. This is not just being selfish sometimes – everyone does that now and then. NPD is a lasting pattern that starts in early adulthood and causes real problems in work, friendships, and family life.

About 1% to 2% of people have NPD, and it happens more often in men. Many people with narcissistic traits never get help because they do not see their actions as a problem.

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Main Signs of a Narcissistic Person

People with narcissistic personality disorder show several key narcissistic traits. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists nine main signs. A doctor needs to see at least five of these for a diagnosis of NPD. Here are the most common ones, explained simply:

• Big sense of self-importance: They believe they are special and better than others. They may brag about their success or expect people to treat them like a star.
• Always needing praise: They crave attention and get upset if no one notices them. Attention-seeking is a big part of their day.
• Lack of empathy: This is one of the hardest parts. They find it tough to care about your feelings or see things from your side.
• Feeling entitled to special treatment: They think rules do not apply to them and deserve the best of everything.
• Using others: They might take advantage of people to get what they want, without feeling bad.
• Jealousy or thinking others are jealous: They envy successful people or believe everyone wants what they have.
• Acting arrogant: They can come across as rude or bossy, putting others down to feel big.

These narcissistic behaviors can make relationships feel one-sided and painful. If you see many of these in yourself or someone close, it might be NPD.

Grandiose vs. Vulnerable Narcissism

Not all narcissists act the same. Some are loud and showy – this is called grandiose narcissism. They seem super confident and demand the spotlight. Others are quieter and sensitive – this is vulnerable narcissism. They might act like victims and feel hurt easily, but still lack empathy deep down. Both types come from the same core issues.

Am I a Narcissist? A Simple Self-Check

Many people ask, Am I a narcissist? Taking time to think about this is already a good sign. Most people with NPD do not question themselves – they blame others instead. Here is an easy Am I a narcissist test with questions based on common tools. Answer yes or no honestly:

• Do you often feel you deserve better treatment than others?
• Is it hard for you to truly celebrate someone else’s success without feeling jealous?
• Do you get very angry or sad when people criticize you?
• Do you find yourself talking mostly about your own achievements in conversations?
• Have friends or family said you do not listen to their feelings?
• Do you expect praise for things that others do without thanks?

If you said yes to several, talk to a professional. Online quizzes can give hints, but only a trained therapist can give a real diagnosis. At We Level Up Washington, we offer kind assessments to help you understand.

How Narcissistic Traits Hurt Relationships and Daily Life

Living with or loving someone with NPD can feel exhausting. Their need for control and lack of empathy leaves others feeling unseen and hurt. Here are ways it shows up:

• In romance: Partners often feel walked over. The person with NPD might cheat, lie, or make everything about their needs.
• In family: A parent with narcissistic traits may favor one child or ignore everyone’s feelings but their own.
• At work: They take credit for your ideas and get mad if not promoted fast.
• With friends: Conversations turn into them talking only about themselves.

People with NPD also struggle. They may feel empty inside, even if they look strong. Many turn to alcohol or drugs to cope, leading to substance use disorder.

NPD often comes with other issues like depression, anxiety, or even borderline personality disorder or histrionic personality disorder.

Why Do Some People Become Narcissists?

No one chooses to have NPD. It grows from a mix of things:

• Childhood experiences play a big role. Too much praise without real love, or the opposite, neglect and criticism, can create these patterns.
• Family history: It sometimes runs in families, maybe from genes or learned behavior.
• Life events: Trauma or always being told you are special can shape a fragile sense of self.

Understanding this helps us feel compassion. People with NPD often hide deep pain behind their big ego.

Ways to Cope If You Live With a Narcissist

You cannot change someone else, but you can protect yourself. Try these steps:

• Set clear boundaries and stick to them, like saying no to rude talk.
• Do not argue to win – it often makes things worse.
• Build a support team of friends or a therapist.
• Take care of your own mental health with exercise, hobbies, or prayer.
• If it feels unsafe, make a plan to leave.

Therapy helps many people heal from narcissistic abuse.

Treatment Options That Really Work

People with narcissistic personality disorder can get better with the right help. Change takes time and willingness, but many do improve.

Common treatments include:

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Teaches new ways to think and act.
• Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Builds skills for emotions and relationships.
• Group therapy: Lets people practice empathy in a safe place.

At We Level Up Washington, we create personal plans that may include therapy, support groups, and help for any substance use issues.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Start Healing Today

Understanding what a narcissist is can feel heavy, but it is the first step to freedom. Whether you see these traits in yourself or someone you love, you do not have to face them alone. NPD is a real mental health condition, but with kindness, support, and the right treatment, life can get much better.

Reach out today – healing starts with one brave call to We Level Up Washington at (509) 348-4077. You deserve peace and healthy connections.

Medical source

https://www.adler.edu/news/a-little-bit-of-narcissism-is-normal-and-healthy-heres-how-to-tell-when-it-becomes-pathological/
https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/000934.htm
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK556001/